HAPPINESS
To not even do the slightest wrong,
this, is happiness.
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Tolerance
September 15, 2008 – 10:42 am
How a flower tolerates a butterfly or a bee.
Sometimes it is better to simply tolerate the wrongs of others rather than trying to stop or oppose them. Everyone has their own set of faults and if one takes a stance of trying to oppose all these wrongs of others it can become a large burden on the mind and weight it down.
A better approach would be to assess what things can and should be tolerated and then tolerated – as a mother would her own children’s weaknesses or a flower tolerates a butterfly or a bee. Most of the wrongs that happen to one another on a day-to-day basis are minor/petty wrongs and most of these can be safely tolerated without much great harm to oneself.
However there are a few exceptional cases where things cannot be simply tolerated. Under such exceptional circumstance it is wise to take positive action contradicting the wrong-doers. The key is to understand what to tolerate and what not to tolerate and this is mostly a personal choice, based on an assessment of how much harm would be caused to oneself and/or others due to tolerance and whether this is acceptable.
May you find the strength to tolerate the misdeeds of others and may you be happy and well! 
TOLERANCE – I
A majority of wrong things,
that others do,
can and should be tolerated,
for others’ sake,
and one’s own peace of mind.
Its only a few things that cannot,
and should not be tolerated,
but if you look closely,
these are few and far between.
TOLERANCE – II
A lot of things should be tolerated,
as a mother would her young children,
or a flower the honey-seeking butterfly or bee,
with a kindly heart.
Otherwise the mind becomes filled with aversion,
conflict, anger and anguish,
taking one’s peace and happiness away.
See Also
- http://www.vihara.org.au/go?to=mettamed
- http://dhammathoughts.wordpress.com/2008/08/26/speaking-words-of-love/
- http://dhammathoughts.wordpress.com/2008/08/11/article_a_buddhist_approach_to_friendship/
- http://dhammathoughts.wordpress.com/2008/08/01/appreciating-the-whole/
- http://dhammathoughts.wordpress.com/2008/07/28/fight-injustice/
Article: A Buddhist Approach to Disenchantment
September 13, 2008 – 10:16 am
Don't dance to Mara's tune!
There is a new Dhamma (reality – the way things really are) article here:
- A Buddhist Approach to Disenchantment
In PDF and HTML formats
Enjoy!
Speaking Words of Love
August 26, 2008 – 11:09 am
Skilful speech
True love is love without selfish desire or attachment. It is selfless and does not ask for anything in return. Selfless love is also an encompassing quality and encompasses many good qualities such as kindness, compassion, honesty, integrity, consideration and selflessness.
The Lord Buddha always spoke with good-will. He spoke words that were timely, truthful, beneficial and kind. He defined such speech as ’skilful speech’ and encouraged others to speak in the same manner. By developing selfless words of love, one would be engaging in such skilful speech by default.
When the art of speaking selfless words of love (skilful speech) is developed and utilized, one is able to transform oneself, one’s neighbors, communities, countries and even the entire world! This is the power of skilful speech; the power of speaking words of selfless love.
See Also
Explaining vs. Censuring
August 18, 2008 – 10:48 am
The importance of explaining with kindness and compassion.
The importance of explaining their faults to others rather than censuring can never be over-emphasized. People do wrong things because they do not understand that they are doing wrong things.
Censuring only prevents others from doing wrong out of fear of getting hurt. After the censuring they may not even understand exactly what they did wrong and continue to do it when the opportunity arises and no one is there to censure them. It can breed resentment in the censured due to the harm it causes them through hurtful words and humiliation.
Explaining to others with kindness and compassion however helps them to clear up whatever is preventing them from seeing the wrong they are doing. This way there is no harm to oneself or the other party through having to resort to anger. It is far more powerful to convince someone that they are doing something wrong and correcting them rather than using forceful and harmful means. When explaining a healthy discussion can ensue and one can find if one’s views are wrong too!
Hope this explanation was helpful!
See Also
Article: A Buddhist Approach to Friendship
August 11, 2008 – 11:03 am
Friendship - The importance of knowing where you stand.
There is a new Dhamma (reality – the way things really are) article here:
- A Buddhist Approach to Friendship
In PDF and HTML formats
Enjoy!
Hidden Agendas
August 3, 2008 – 6:30 am
Hidden Agendas - One of many of the games that we have to play in life!
It is important to always be weary and watchful of hidden agendas. For example someone can try to do something that looks like one thing on the surface, but is actually another thing underneath. This is an example of a hidden agenda. This someone may not even be aware of this themselves however, due to the blinding effects of delusion (moha).
So when others try to act with hidden agendas and when it can be harmful to oneself and/or others, these actions need to be blocked, prevented, stopped, opposed by utilizing skilful means. This can go on like a game of chess, where the other ‘makes a move’ and you counter that. Then they would make another move and you would respond to that and so on.
This guideline also applies to our own actions. We need to see if we are acting with hidden and/or unskilful agendas and if we are, stop, prevent, block and oppose those things within ourselves by utilizing skilful means.
See Also
Appreciating the Whole
August 1, 2008 – 3:01 pm
The Earth - One small fraction of the Universe!
Everyone has weaknesses that they were born with; weaknesses inherited from their habits/character from previous lives. We also have our own set of weaknesses. It helps to always understand and see this when dealing with others.
Every being also strengths. Everyone, no matter who they are or what they are like, has atleast one good property. It maybe buried deep inside. It is wise to re-call and bring to mind these good properties that everyone has, especially when we are at odds with them. Where possible those good properties should be encouraged and brought out in others through assistance, where this is safe and wise to do so.
The key is to uplift everyone rather than conflicting with them, and understand the wholeness, or the big picture where everyone fits in. All beings are part of this whole, every being is a tiny fragment of the whole. It is good to bring to mind the interconnectedness of all beings, rather than dwelling on the separateness or the differences that exist. So look at the commonality and see how all beings connect with one another where possible.
This however does not mean that we should let others take advantage of us. We need to prevent others from doing inappropriate/unfair things and taking advantage of ourselves through skillful means while appreciating their goodness and understanding their commonality with us. One commonality is that we all have weaknesses and strengths.
Hoping that you will see and appreciate the whole!
See Also
Article: A Buddhist Approach to Disillusionment
July 31, 2008 – 12:01 am
Trickery - One of the various tricks in the world!
There is a new Dhamma (reality – the way things really are) article here:
- A Buddhist Approach to Disillusionment
In PDF and HTML formats
Enjoy!
Fight Injustice
July 28, 2008 – 2:27 pm
Fight injustice!
There are many injustices in this world that should not be simply tolerated. While tolerence is good in certain instances, there are times when it unwise to simply ‘tolerate and wait,’ as this can cause a lot of harm to oneself and/or others. However it is important to do this while not sinking to the level of our attackers.
The weapons that one has for skillfully battling injustices are truth (sacca), patience (khanti), kindness (metta) and compassion (karuna). At times, it maybe wise to tolerate and wait as well, use judgment and wisdom (panna) to decide what’s best.
May you be victorious against all the ills of life!
See Also
